White House Correspondent's Dinner

72-Hour Rule

Yup. I use AI art. I’m a thug, not an artist.

While I’m not going to comment directly about the occurrence at the 2026 White House Correspondent’s Dinner, I am going to opine about something tangential to what happened.

Folks ask me, “Ian, why do you hate people so much?”

And I do. The public as a whole annoys the whey out of me. Humanity in general is nothing more than up-jumped apes; and not only do they possess the full measure of petty biliousness and vile moral depravity of our primate cousins, intelligence has just given humanity the key do it better.

Do you doubt me?

Seven months ago Erika Kirk saw her husband — the father of her children — killed by gunfire. Last night, what sounded like gunfire erupted in her hearing, followed by a response by the Secret Service and tac-teams that bolstered the idea that Something Bad Was Going On.

She was filmed shortly after — in tears, hurrying away, stating that she “Just wanted to go home.”

Boy, can I sympathize. I have been on the receiving end of my fair share of incoming gunfire. And I’m here to tell you: Despite being trained to deal with it, and despite being paid to deal with it … most of the time I wanted to just go home, too.

But, there’s this little ray of sunshine:

That Gay Guy Candle Co. 🇺🇸@gayguycandleco

😂😂😂 The most performative woman who ever lived.

1:33 AM · Apr 26, 2026 · 8.66M Views

---

3.87K Replies · 4.69K Reposts · 49.6K Likes

Let’s mock a widow, less than a year after a traumatic event, responding to yet another traumatic event, of the same variety of trauma — and you wonder why I hate people?

Kash Patel is the Director of the Federal Bureau of Investigation. Of your kindness, do note the last word of that title — “Investigation”. He was at the dinner, and he may or may not have been armed.

The President of the United States was present. Once gunfire started that scene belonged to the Secret Service. That room was full of jocked-up Secret Service tactical team members with levelled M4s, and jumpy plainclothed Secret Service agents itching to stitch a brisket with 4.6x30mm rounds¹ looking for threats. They don’t want unasked for assistance. They don’t need unasked for assistance. That entire scene belongs solely to them at that time, and if they feel they need assistance, they'll jolly well ask for it.²

Matter-of-fact, jumping up and getting in their way while asserting your title is a damned fine way to complicate an already complex situation, and is a fantastic way to get crunched and/or shot.

Director Patel — understanding that his services will be required later during the investigation phase of this mess — and not wanting to distract, interfere with, and/or exacerbate current problems, crouches down and protects his wife girlfriend.³

Smart. Tactically savvy. Not to mention being the duty of a man.

Except, of course, if you’re the trash that is humanity. Read the comments on that reel, and then ask me again why I hate people.

When floods swept through Central Texas, and killed a camp full of teenage girls, the number of people — to include alleged medical people — dancing on the graves of those children was disgusting.

Speaking of alleged medical personnel — you know, those people who provide care when other people are at their most vulnerable, and who swear oaths to “Do No Harm” — you seen some of those folks Greatest Hits?

One of the only redeeming values of social media is the fact that it allows the entire world to see what a bunch of horrid little oiks humanity actually is.

You don’t believe me? Take a look around the Left side of your social media right now.

Ian

1. That was the most H&K MP7s I’ve ever seen in one place. Damn.

2. Yeah, don’t hold your breath — they’re not going to ask.

3. My bad.